I hadn’t run with Bristol Hash in YEARS (special events notwithstanding). Here I was though at
the Chew Valley Lake picnic site, raring to go. A quick run down of my pre-run checklist to make
sure that I had remembered everything before the off:
Been to the loo | check |
Shorts | check |
Socks | check |
Shoes | check |
Running vest | check |
Enthusiasm | um… |
Whiffy | check |
11:00 and 01 seconds and PJ was wondering aloud why we hadn’t left yet and handing out free
pens (well I got one anyway). He was a fine one to talk, he wasn’t out of his trousers yet! (ooh err!).
The trail can be summarised as follows:
- On the plus side: choc ices; sunshine; good views; an interesting trail; a sneaky regroup at
the end.
- On the minus side: No choc ice for Ray (Kneed ate it); sunburn; nettle stings; a trail that did
not follow the prescribed BH3 route from that start-point; a sneaky regroup at the end.
The sneaky regroup at the end allowed the hare to overtake the runners to prepare the Pimms and
Lemonade at the end. Everyone thought Dan was very posh to even consider Pimms a suitable
drink for a hash, but drank it anyway. Whiffy liked the Pimms best, I liked the Lemonade,
Soprano liked the Strawberries and Spiderman liked the Mint. Bingo!
Off to the pub in Chew Magna for some booze and the down downs. Soprano ran to the pub but
avoided castigation because of her position as the Hash’s First Lady. She’s in training apparently,
although I can’t imagine why she should want to be any faster, there is a speed limit on the roads
these days you know!!!
Down downs were memorable but I don’t remember them. I do recall Kneed wasting good beer by
pouring it over his head, and lost property being doled out: Jan got back the clothes that Dan had
borrowed and Sweatmonster broke out into a smile at the return of his beloved ‘Penang’ hat.
Then on to Dan's house for BBQ, beer and swimming pool hi-jinx. If all Bristol Hashes are this
much fun you'll be seeing me again soon.
On on!
THE MASTER PLAN: |
THE REALITY: |
Clear, sunny, warm, day. | Clear, dry, not very warm. |
No wind. | Blowing a gale off the sea on-shore. |
Usual quality bollocks trail. | Usual quality bollocks trail. |
Hash hoardes turn up, so buy enough salads, cider, plates etc. to feed them. | Only a dozen Hashers turn up, over run with salads, cider, plates etc. |
Set trail in the morning. | Trail set in the morning. |
Take friend’s dog we are looking after with me to set the trail. | Just before half way round setting the trail, lose dog. Abandon search after half an hour to finish trail in time. Second half of trail complete bollocks.
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Take in an Ice Cream stop | Ice Cream stop a success.
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Take in a reverential stop out side Bob Reynolds house. | Knock on Bob’s door not expecting an answer as I know he’s in Hong Kong. But wife answers whose always hated Hashers. She makes feeble excuse about no beer in fridge. Hashers exit rapidly stage left.
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Don’t lose anyone to injury | Gullible twists ankle, he and Celia short cut back, missing Ice Cream stop and BBQ.
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Have a good time on the beach apres Hash | Spend a short time on beach spent huddled against wind. BBQ a great success as wind makes it go with `gusto’. Too cold to stay long, so a quick nibble and off home to warm up.
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