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The story so far
Minutes of the 28th Annual General Piss-Up held on 27th March 2010 at The Bridge Inn, Passage Street, Bristol.
Minutes Secretary: Wolfie.

This was the first AGPU held at The Bridge Inn. Pre-meeting gossip centred around the suggestion that there may be some sexual tension, generally considered to be more an aspiration than a firm commitment, between the current Grand Master, Wet Wipe, and the barman of The Bridge.

Wet Wipe, opened the formal meeting by welcoming those present.

  1. Apologies. Puki apologised for Clem.
  1. Minutes of the last meeting. These were approved as being accurate in every detail and written in an almost forensic documentary style, with a broad literary sweep combining the best of Shakespeare, Milton, Wilde and Dylan (both Bob and Thomas).
  1. Matters Arising. There were none.
  1. Outgoing officers' reports.
    1. Grand Master. Wet Wipe invited us to look at the arse on that.
    2. Hash Cash. Sleepy distributed accounts which are included with, and form part of, these minutes. See below.
    3. Hare Raiser. Spiderman reported that hares had been supplied for every run during 2009.
    4. Stats. Wolfie stated that he had managed to maintain the average number of runners per run at a record 24 for a second consecutive year, despite difficult economic conditions.
  1. Proposals for Hash and Pub Awards.

    1. Best hash location. Lunchbox proposed The New Inn, Pwyllmeric, as follows: Delightful run through fantastic woodland. All off-road on a warm sunny day: Spring in the air! At last winter was over! Lovely twisting forest trails. Set with a great degree of skill and complexity. Buzzards and Kites overhead. Lovely views of the Severn Estuary and Severn Bridges from the tump. And an ostrich farm too! So many smiling faces!
      It was pointed out that the run from this pub took place on the 14th March 2010 and that these awards were for the calendar year of 2009, which rendered the nomination invalid. There were no other nominations.
    2. Best pub for service, beer, range of light snacks, carpark, toilets and prices. Wet Wipe proposed The Beaufort Inn, Hawkesbury Upton, which was seconded and carried.
    3. Worst hash location. Waynetta proposed The Wheatsheaf, Corston, “'cos of that bloody long road!”, which was seconded and passed unanimously.
    4. Worst pub for service, beer, range of light snacks, carpark, toilets and prices. Lunchbox proposed The New Inn, Pwyllmeric, as follows: 40 runners for the Bristol/Cardiff (Revival) joint run. Forty salivating hashers on a hot day. There were only two pints at the bottom of the barrel. "Happy to wait while you change it!" says I. "But they're not delivering my next barrel 'til Wednesday" said the landlady. "What else can I get you lads instead?" Not too many smiling faces.
      It was pointed out that the run from this pub took place on the 14th March 2010 and that these awards were for the calendar year of 2009, which rendered the nomination invalid. There were no other nominations.

  2. Bristol and Allied Hashes Pension Scheme (BAHPS). Lunchbox said that, for reasons which would become apparent during his forthcoming embezzlement trial, he was resigning from the post of BAHPS Chairperson. A proposal from Puki Jangut that Lunchbox should rot in hell was deemed inappropriate.

  3. Proposal for alternate Sunday morning/Monday night runs between May and August, inclusive. This proposal from Lunchbox was not seconded and therefore not voted on.

  4. Grand Bru Beer Scandal (1991). Due to the non-attendance of the various legal teams, and the imminence of the free curry, this matter was not discussed.

  5. Resignation of Officers. In accordance with Hash AGPU rules, the officers present resigned. Down-downs were downed.

  6. Election of Officers. The following officers were elected:

    1. Grand Master: Massive
    2. Joint Masters: Wet Wipe and Scoop
    3. Hash Cash: Sleepy
    4. On-Sec, Stats, Webshite: Wolfie
    5. Joint Religious Advisers: Scoop and Trolley Dolly
    6. Hare Raiser: Spiderman
    7. Hash Horn: Fur-lined Booties
    8. Hash Haberdasher: Soprano
    9. Awards Co-ordinator: Wet Wipe
    10. Hash Flash: Three and Fourpence
    11. Hasher Basher: Soprano
    12. Social Committee: Wet Wipe (chair), Waynetta, Rob Newton and Soprano
    13. Mee-mee: Doris Doombar
    14. Assistant Mee-me: Scoop
    15. Beer Master: HBK.
[The remainder of the meeting was chaired by the new GM, Massive.]
  1. A vote of thanks to Wet Wipe for her four years at the helm was supported by all present.
  1. Any Other Business.

    1. Insurance. Lunchbox proposed that we subscribe to the national Hashers' insurance scheme. After some discussion, during which Sleepy declared that his continuing committee membership would be contingent on the club joining the scheme, it was decided that, subject to confirmation of costs, etc., we would join as at April 2010.
    2. Nominating” down-downs. Lunchbox, now speaking from a prone position, declared that he was sick of people getting down-downs for legitimate reasons, then “nominating” someone else to drink them. He felt that, at the very least, the person nominated by the RA should give a good reason for the person they were nominating. Alternatively, if driving/working later in the day or on presentation of a current doctor's certificate, they could request a non-alcoholic drink. Or, of course, there was always the traditional option of “wearing it”. Although a formal motion was not proposed, the general feeling of the meeting was that Lunchbox had a good point. The new RAs were asked to take note.

  2. Date of Next Meeting: Saturday, 2nd April 2011.
The meeting ended at 9:00 pm.